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           I wonder why is there so many question in this world, and I just got irritated for no reason and I always got fed up when my life is in pressure. I don't know if I'm a guy that can't accept hard work or that I always live in easy work too much. Hard work for me, is not what we means by using strength too much and got your self tired, is our mentally problem causes by too much of thinking and working. God(I don't know who he is but he is a fair existence, cause he make everything balance) create things in such a way that every human being has their weakness and their talent. Although many people see as that I can understand things and got to solve problem fast, but they don't know being good in IQ doesn't mean that I have a good memory. Malaysia is a country that need memorising in everything, a stupid way of living cause human should be creative not memorise everything and call your self smart. I still have the accept the faith that I live here and I must work for what I wan't and I learn from a good teacher that we should not complain but we should work. I really don't know how to solve the problem of being bad in memorising, what can I really do? I started miserably thinking that I'm so stupid that everyone can memorise things but I'm a stupid dum dum that  can do nothing although I understand things better, I can't explain things in words, I ask my friend, my teacher, even my family..... but the same answer came out, memorise.
            I would not be in headache if all my problem is solve. It is not cause by one major problem but many little problem that shouldn't have been even a big problem but when it all comes together it just became a real problem to me. Firstly is my family, if you ask me do I love my family, I would say yes, but I don't have any prove for that. After some few lesson I started to hate death, this is a problem that can't be deny by every human being since even the sun and earth has their limit. My father, he is a smoker, I talked to him few times but just have some little effect on him. I don't know how he accept about the world. I know that I can't lost him. Then the problem come to my mother, she seems to be always in bad mood this few month and I don't even dare to ask her why. My brother, that moron that also started smoking for no reason but it's his life, I can't anything except telling him what he should but what he want to do is not my business. My younger brother has no problem for me cause he is as playful as always and seems to be normal. My grandmother is old, he love us. I respect her, but the way my brother treated her make me angry every time, I hope I won't lost my temper and hit him one day.
            Today I went for kokurikulum in school, whole day work and I got no time to rest. After I came back from school still have to go for tuition at 7 o'clock till 10 o'clock. When I finally finish my tuition and going back home, my mother was talking to her friend and we started a topic, driving motorcycle. I'm a good driver, my father bought a Kawasaki motor and he told me that he wanted to bring me for a mountain ride one day. I was so happy, until the day he tell us that we won't be riding on motor because it is very dangerous. Today I found out the reason, my mother said that it is because of my brother. He is too naughty and he is causing allot of trouble. If my father let me take my license for motor but don't let my brother, it will cause him to mumble and talk stupid things. So I was not allowed to have license. All my dream since I was a child is to have fun with my father cause he is a very emo man but he is also a very protective man. It was all destroyed by my devil brother that don't even know how to think. But at least I still can take photo with my father when we are free, maybe that's still a way of being together. I hope everything will go well when time passes.
           If any of my friend is reading this, leave a comment please cause I tak tau who got read who doesn't lol = = and this blog has been abandon for so long. Hope there is still someone that remember it although I never tell anyone that I started writing again.