[Interesting Idea] Pulling the peg

Just watched a video about atheism. The speaker believe that humanity is being pulled back from progress by religion, and he described it using trains. The trains are ran by scientist in the first cart, while subsequently the people behind are dragging the train slowing it down by not contributing. Posted it on Facebook and took it down after awhile, I think I should stop believing in talking to people about problems, they simply do not give a shit. Here's the post for record, this is an interesting idea, it does change my mind right now, but I'm not sure how this will affect me in the future, who knows it might even helps.

" People can believe whatever the fuck they want, but when the world ends it doesn't gives a fuck about what you believe. People needs to grow up and away from the fear of not being guided by a divine being, grow the fuck up and walk it yourself. Things aren't always gonna be okay....... when problem comes we have to fix it, ourselves.

Maybe instead of trying so hard for a lifetime to safe the one dragging us (us as in humanity, in case people get offended) behind, maybe the wisest choice to save humanity is to pull the peg.

PS: After writing this I also realize a big part that contribute to this is human's selfish desire to achieve their goal that defines only by their lifetime, we simply do not care about the fate of humanity far beyond ours, I may be the only one (or at least around me) that feel the terror whenever I think about the end of humanity, when fossil of our creation is left behind in a giant ball floating around in cold dark space. 

Apparently selfishness, although been taught to be negative, seems to be enjoyed and praised by humanity. We live in a world where everyone just wants to get rich, buy cars and houses that meant nothing after our death, and for guys sex seems to be extremely attractive (I really just do not understand this desire, I do seek companionship but there has never been just for sexual interaction, it would be nice if someone is actually out there but I think I've experience enough to understand that I'm definitely gonna walk this alone). 

The world needs another perspective, I would be dead if it's not for others' sake, there is simply no reason for me to exist, I live because people around me wants me to and expect me to. I am not saying this to feel superior, it is just that I feel extremely lonely, there is simply no one that share the same perspective, and no one that actually cares, I do not know how to convince others anymore, it seems that I'm the one that is not fitting in, I have already lost the confident to be vocal (for matters that is related to this discussion). I believe that if human were to survive for thousand more years we need to stop thinking just about 'me', but about 'us'. This is something that is not in our gene, I don't think human will ever understand this concept. I still remember the time that I thought that being different means being like Einstein, or Tesla, or Newton, or Davinci, this is not as fun as I thought I guess "

The Snake With A Thousand Layers Of Skins

My mind can't seem to make any firm decisions, day by day things are changing all around while my view of this world transform from one to another. Things that I thought meant a lot no longer triggers any emotion, while new things kept coming in and makes me drift away from the path that I thought was inevitable. It feels like there are new roads emerging all round while I'm just walking blindfolded like a fool. I no longer understand what is important, all I can do now is gather all the old memories and piece by piece complete the puzzle, praying that I will see a complete picture in the end of this 'game'. All I can do now is treasure what was and has always been important, as I do not know when these will be either be lost or fade away in the background turning insignificant. 

I do not know who I am, this has always, always......... been a problem. The realization every time an important memory triggers in my brain turns me insane, there is so much sadness, and hope, hoping that what has been just dreams can one day come true. I no longer feel depress, only sadness, emptiness, the fire of hatred has burnt out, turning into disappointment. Every year, at this moment, the same feeling would emerge. Have I been waiting for someone? Have I been waiting for something to happen? This year........ am I running away from something? Is there something that I must do? It may be a confusion caused by excitement from an old memory, although a moment ago it does not feels like anything important.

My journey, feels like a snake with a thousand layers of skins, every layers are different from one another but also very much similar. Day by day the skin will shed while the snake no longer knows what it looks like until looking at the mirror. Sometimes I wonder if I really am the same person I thought I wanted to be, or am I just another personality created to fit into the story, while the real person has always been hiding inside waiting for someone to open the door. I just do not know.......... This may feel like nonsense but I really wish I could find the answer, the only thing I can use to tell me who I am, is Dreams, always remember Dreams.

I'll let it end there, tried writing something different this time, I wonder what it will feel like when it is read in the future again. It feels excited while at the same time scary, because every single thing wrote here is what I felt at this moment. I may be reading this in the future while retaining the memory of doing this but no longer understand the reasons or emotions behind this. I have always hope that someone would replace the consciousness in this body, maybe it is working, but not in the way I was hoping it to be, as consciousness is just an illusion. No matter what I do, this body will still exist, and memory will still be made.